I don’t work. I did, many months ago before stopping. I am however a full time student for the seven or so months of the year that uni occurs. For me, that’s plenty enough to deal with. Compared to the people I know and have talked to though, it’s slack.
One of the drawbacks of appearing to cope as well as everyone else and keeping your struggles hidden is that you’re expected to function as well as everyone else too. Most of the people I know who are studying also have a part time job. As well as that, they also find time for extracurricular activities and socialising. How do they do that?!
I met up with a high school friend for lunch yesterday. I told her that I don’t do anything much during the break and answered “Not really,” when she asked me whether I was looking forward to returning to uni. “So lazy, WFH!” she jokingly teased me.
Prior to that, my OT supervisors at fieldwork asked me whether I had a job or not. I told them yes, I work in a pharmacy when in reality I ceased there early last year. I lied, embarrassed at how lazy I must seem if I told them the truth.
I feel like I should be doing more. Everybody else is. But then thinking about the amount of study I need to do, the amount of effort I need to put in to pass my units at uni already starts to send me into panic. And that’s without a job on the side or even much of a social life. Not to mention, both semesters last year left me playing catch up as a result of my two hospital admissions. Keeping a job at the same time would not have been manageable at all. Being able to pass uni is a big enough achievement for me. When I juxtapose that with what my friends are able to achieve though, it feels like nothing at all.