Ceased therapy with psychologist number 2

Today I bid farewell to my (now ex) psychologist for the last time. I managed to come out with it that I had been thinking of ceasing treatment, my rationale being, ‘I’m sick of it’ and ‘nothing’s changed’.  Which, while the truth, is not the complete story either. I received no objection from her which was convenient.  My intentions in ending it were not to ‘test’ her or play mind games at all, but I confess I feel a bit tossed aside that she didn’t even suggest, ‘Hey, I think you do need some professional support in place, even if therapy with me is discontinued.’ Which confirms for me that my issues aren’t all that serious to warrant help, I don’t deserve support, etc etc.

She wrote down for me that if I am suicidal or thinking of overdosing, I should contact my GP or Dr T (psychiatrist), and then wished me the ‘best of luck with everything’. Which is really helpful considering a) I don’t have a GP  and b) Dr T is likely to discharge me as a patient due to my not taking of medication. Ho hum, guess I’m left with no options for support should I find myself in crisis.

Upon walking out of her office I felt initial relief, satisfaction and a sense of elation because “Ha, that was easy!” My mood has since dipped and hopelessness is now crowding my mind. Not because I regret my decision, our lack of a connection tells me it’s the right thing to do.  But because after seeing a school counsellor and two psychologists, nothing’s changed, and I’m left stranded without help, yet again. It’s feeling like no one can or is willing to help me.

9 thoughts on “Ceased therapy with psychologist number 2

  1. I’m sorry to hear things didn’t work out, hon. The right person can make all the difference in the world. Don’t give up, they’re out there. Took me 13 years to find mine. Totally worth it yhough. Do not give up!

  2. I agree with Splinteredones – it is all about the right person. I have lost count of how many people I have seen in total, but there has been at least 3 psychologists, 5 CPNs/Social Workers/OTs, 5 main psychiatrists, countless others I have seen just once or twice, 4 counsellors, lots of crisis team intervention, 3 different hospital stays and all the staff there, etc etc. So I have seen a shit load of people, over a 7 year period. Plus loads of medications. Has anything changed? Yes, things always change – nobody stays in exactly the same state for long periods. But there has been no improvement. Some things have got better, others have got worse, others have changed but not in a getting better or worse kind of way – just different.

    Don’t give up. Your treatment has been pretty sporadic, and you haven’t seen anyone for a long period of time. I think you need to see someone else, but perhaps try something a bit different. I’m not sure what, but maybe something that has a very definite structure like CAT might help. I think your sessions need to be more regular – I can’t imagine going to see someone once a month and being able to form any type of trusting relationship with them – it doesn’t seem realistic. If you don’t want to see another psychologist via the actual health system, what about seeing a counsellor for a while instead? Maybe you need someone to talk things through with rather than structured therapy, but someone you can see more frequently than once a month. I don’t know. All I am saying is there are lots of options to look into, and not to give up. Think about what you think would help you most and look into how you can access it. But I don’t think that seeing a psychologist monthly is likely to be the answer.

    xxx

  3. I think it’s disheartening that she didn’t put up much of a fight in you leaving. I like Bip’s suggestions. Remember, you don’t know for sure if P-doc will discharge you, but maybe you could look for alternate supports before then?

  4. I know how hard it is to not find a treatment team that is working. I’m really sorry about the deal w/the psych. I currently DO NOT like my psych at all but I’m stuck with him. I feel like i’m with plateaued or even going downhill at the moment.

    Hang in there- keep holding on strong…you’ll find someone. I promise.

    xoxo
    -Lisa

  5. Sorry things were not going right for you with this Psychologist, it can be very hard to lose the support of someone suddenly even if you have instigated it yourself, I know I am still very much attached to a Psychologist I have not seen in around 18 months! I found support in her but had a row with someone else running the group the week she was off sick and I never returned.

    If you feel she didn’t question why you wanted to leave, to me that say she was not so good at her job, or specifically didn’t understand you. Could you maybe contact her and go back if you are having second thoughts? As for being discharged from the PDOC, surely if you are not well or mentally fit he cannot discharge you…

  6. {{{hugs}}} not that feeling – it is so unfair that as well as dealing with mental health problems, it seems to be the curse of those thus afflicted to walk the earth looking for some damned help (I’m feeling a little poetic tonight – sorry for that).

    Shitty place to be in, and no good solution. I hope that you do find people that can help/support/care for you – it does make all the difference when you do…

    Take care,
    Differently

  7. I hope you look for and find another therapist. Please don’t give up. It’s all about finding the right person, who provides support tailored to your needs. I’m thinking of ending it soon with my therapist as well, because I don’t think his therapeutic approach is working for me right now. It’s tough, I know. Hang in there.

  8. hey, i totally understand what you mean about it not helping. I had that similar situation with my support work from the richmond fellowship. How when i was with them i didnt feel it was helping so i cancelled it. Then i realised “you know what, they were a bit of company for a few hours” which made me take the support back again and it starts today. Also though at the same time it makes me feel “these people are only here because they have to be, not because they want to be”. It plays mind games with me and causes me to feel abandoned.

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