Last Friday, a week after my appointment with Dr T (psychiatrist), I finally gathered the courage to dial the number of the psychologist I am being referred to to make an appointment. I got through to her voicemail and listened to her voice recording asking callers to leave a message, and she’d phone back before the end of the day. I called up at about 1:30pm on the Friday and by the end of the day I still hadn’t heard back from her. Due to the following days being a weekend and the Monday being a public holiday, I expected if I was going to receive a call, it would be today on the Tuesday. It’s now past 9pm. She hasn’t rung me back.
It doesn’t give me much hope for this new psychologist.
Who I did receive a phone call from today was Dr T’s secretary. I’m not entirely sure what the point of this phone call was. She asked whether I will still be coming in tomorrow. Yes, unfortunately. Tempted to say no, but at least 24 hours notice of cancellation is required to avoid being charged a fee and by then it was past the 24 hours. I scarcely have the money to be freely throwing away on non-attendance at appointments. The secretary advised me that someone else had cancelled their appointment for tomorrow at 1pm (damn, why didn’t I do that earlier?) and enquired as to whether I would like to come in at that time instead of at 12pm. I told the secretary I could come in at 1pm if they prefer, she tells me it doesn’t matter. Alrighty then. I will stick to my appointment at 12pm.
I can’t help dissecting this phone call in my head. Was the secretary calling because Dr T does not want to see me tomorrow, as I am clearly just a waste of time, not worth her help? Or maybe she just wants to ensure she doesn’t lose out on seeing yet another patient tomorrow. No clients equals no earnings after all.
I’ve decided I will go to my appointment tomorrow open to trialing medication, though part of me doubts it will happen in the end. I don’t view my mental health issues to be severe enough to warrant medication, and I’m expecting Dr T to tell me as much. I’m envisioning that even if I do say ‘Yes,’ she’s going to say ‘No,’ and tell me I’m just looking for a quick fix and she’s not going to prescribe me anything after all.
I’m also half anticipating to be told by Dr T that the psychologist she was planning to refer me to doesn’t want to work with for various reasons, which is why she hasn’t rung me back.
No doubt I’ll be back tomorrow with some updates.