I need to stop. Yet I don’t know how. I hate the feeling of being out of control and disgusted with myself when I binge. And when I do binge it then leads to purging.
I’ve heard people say that you shouldn’t restrict because it’ll just lead to bingeing. Which makes sense and is fair enough. I remember last year especially when I’d come home from school after not eating very much at all for the whole day and end up bingeing and purging because I was hungry. So I know it’s true that starving yourself will lead to bingeing.
But the thing is that I haven’t really been restricting and I’m not even hungry when I binge these days. Now I’ve found that it’s more to do with emotional reasons. These days it’s more like;
And then once I do start on the food I’m more likely to binge on I think, ‘Well might as well just keep on eating then,’ which results in me bingeing and purging.
Because it’s to do with emotional reasons I find it SO much harder to stop. If bingeing was a physical response to hunger, at least I’d KNOW the solution was to not restrict even if it’s not that easy to practice. But when it’s an emotional response I have no idea what the solution is.