I’ve filled in…

…two of the ‘Thought Diary’ sheets that GK (my psych) told me to fill out. I feel like I don’t really want to show her though. I always feel so pathetic when I get upset/anxious about a situation that I shouldn’t be upset over because it’s so insignificant.

I think I should probably tell her about taking *dua belas* acetaminophen too. This happened a week ago now and I’ve felt fine so I think it’s okay and I haven’t done any damage really. But same thing, I feel pathetic because I did it because of small things building up and it’s just pathetic because it’s something that most people would be able to deal with. But not me…

Over the past few months I’ve finished the pack of *seratus* lx. I know that all they do is get rid of your water weight and leave you dehydrated and feeling sick and also have the danger of you becoming physically dependant on them. So I don’t know why I still take them. I guess it makes me think I’ve lost weight but really I haven’t. All it has done is give me the worst stomach pains ever and leave me feeling sick. Which is why I need to try and resist purchasing another pack.

I counted how long the 18 sessions I get per year will last me and I figured out that if I’m seeing her fortnightly I’m going to run out of sessions by the beginning of October. Which leaves me without support for about 3 months until I can get another 18 sessions for next year. What I’m afraid of in seeing a psychologist is that now I am receiving help, I’ll become dependant on it. But, I guess I’ve survived all those years by myself, I can continue to survive by myself.

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